Don’t Automate the Soul Out of Your Brand

A little connection still goes a long way.

Over the weekend, I went out for breakfast with my family - six of us squeezed around a table at a local cafe I’ve been to a bunch of times. I know the place. The food’s good. I’ve recommended it to other people. I like going there.

We sat down and - no surprise - there were QR codes on the table for ordering. I’ve used them here before when catching up with friends. Ordering a cheese plate and a glass of wine? No problem. But this was the first time I’d gone for a full sit-down breakfast with a group… and ordering for six people through an app is a different story entirely.

When we arrived, I asked if we could move a couple of tables together - one of the staff helped, then disappeared. No welcome. No check-in. No, “Hey, just a heads up, here’s how the ordering works.” Definitely no offer of coffee (clocked that one!). So after sitting there awkwardly for a while, I started the order on the app.

And I found the app clunky. It took me about 10 minutes to enter the food order for the table. And then I realised… there was no way to order coffee. 🫣

My kids roll their eyes at me when I mutter about poor system design, but honestly - I literally design this stuff every day so if I’m struggling, it’s not just a me problem. So I went inside to ask about the coffee and the staff were genuinely surprised - they also thought the coffee options were in the app. They weren’t. So they took our whole order manually over the counter, which honestly would’ve been faster from the start.

The food, once it came, was great - fresh, well-presented, genuinely. But the thing was: we sat in that cafe for almost 30 minutes before a single thing arrived at the table or a staff member acknowledged us. And sadly, that’s what we remembered when we left.

If someone had come over - explained the ordering process, offered coffees, said a quick hello - we would’ve felt acknowledged, not like a transaction.

Instead, we figured it out ourselves, felt a bit awkward, and sat for nearly half an hour without a coffee on a Sunday morning! The food was great, but the experience? Disconnected. And you can feel annoyed at me saying this about automation, because small business is hard and it saves time and money but trust me I know, and I'm not against automation - but there’s a real missed opportunity to improve the business here:

For example, we would’ve ordered more. Two rounds of coffee, easily. Maybe added a side or two. We might’ve been nudged toward a special or suggested something new. The staff were pleasant when asked. The food was good. But no one connected with us at all.

Also - how would they know we’ve been coming for years? That we’re locals? That we bring other people with us? They wouldn’t know. Because the system has replaced the relationship.

And that’s where the brand suffers. Because people talk. Not just about the food - but about how they felt. And we didn’t leave feeling like regulars. We left feeling like we were kind of inconvenient.

And to be honest, it wasn’t just that one experience this week.

A few days later, I needed to cancel a dinner reservation at one of my favourite restaurants, the one I choose for my birthdays and special occasions. But instead of talking to a person, I surprisingly had a full conversation on the phone with a bot. The voice was allllmost human but not quite (mildly creepy). The bot cancelled my booking and… that was it. No human contact. No “can we help you rebook?” Transactional.

Would I have rebooked if I’d been able to have a conversation with someone? Absolutely. But I didn’t. Because no one asked.

So here’s the reminder for all of us: Brand isn’t just what people see, it’s how they feel when they interact with you.

And when you remove the human layer of connection, you lose the part that builds loyalty, increases spend, and turns a one-time customer into someone who sends others your way.

So yes - automate what makes sense - we can’t escape that reality now. But don’t automate the soul out of your brand. Efficiency matters - and so does eye contact.

There’s a place for automations but if you introduce one, communicate with your customers and team about it, and be mindful of what you are losing so you can adjust and make connections in other ways.